The man wearing the samo had left.
General Hunmu left as well.
As a result, I was left alone with the king.
I couldn’t breathe. I just want to get out of here.
After General Hunmu left, the king remained seated in silence, so still I couldn’t tell what he was doing.
My neck was starting to ache from keeping my head bowed for so long, but he didn’t say a single word after making me stay here alone.
To become someone I wanted to avoid in just a single day — perhaps that too was his talent.
How long had I been like this?
My knees, bent in a kneeling position, were cramping and going numb, and the back of my neck was so tense and strained that I began to wonder if the king had fallen asleep.
Flinch.
But when I slightly lifted my head, unexpectedly, the king was staring at me.
His chin rested on his hand as he gazed at me intently.
Our eyes met, and I forgot about the cramp and quickly bowed my head again.
"How did you intend to return?"
"Pardon?"
“...”
“Ah... that...”
Should I tell the king the truth?
In just a few seconds, a dozen possible answers sprang to mind as I wondered if I should tell the king that I had jumped into the river or not.
For some reason, it felt like I shouldn’t speak honestly, but then again, since it was obvious that Hunmu would tell him everything, I thought it would be better to phrase it more gently.
Yank!
But then, the king suddenly stood up from his seat, strode over, and sharply pulled me to my feet.
After kneeling for a long time, my knees gave out, and as I staggered, the king, with more strength than I expected, quickly wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me so close that I almost touched him.
My heart pounded as if it might burst.
I couldn't help but think, 'Was the king always this tall?'
His face and eyes, seen up close, were even colder and sharper than when I had seen them from afar.
"How dare you take your time to think when I asked you a question? Were you planning to lie?"
"N-no…”
"I asked how you intended to return."
"...I jumped into the river."
"The river?"
"In a book I read back home, there was a story that said jumping into water could bring someone back... So, I jumped into the river."
"Are there many people like you?"
“No... I’m not even sure if the contents of that book are based on real experiences. It also says that coming to another world like this is impossible. It’s a book that compiles stories, and you can't be sure which ones are true...”
"Here I thought you were afraid of dying, but if you were bold enough to throw yourself into a river, you must be quite a daring woman."
"...I just thought that if I gave myself a shock, I might be able to return..."
Even while dating Kyuhyun, we had never been this blatantly close, with our bodies so near to each other. He was always so kind, and I liked him so much that I never thought it was strange.
But now, with my body so close to the king’s — close enough that an intimate area might accidentally touch — my face flushed with embarrassment at this unfamiliar experience.
Before I could even feel my face burning, I could tell from the king's slightly turned gaze that he had noticed my reaction.
Rustle.
When the hand that had wrapped around my waist finally fell away, thankfully, the leg that had cramped was now relaxed.
Gripping my dishevelled clothes, I stood up straight, and to my surprise, the king, now lying on the bed, gestured for me to come over.
After sending General Hunmu away and leaving only me behind, I had actually feared that this might happen.
However, I had convinced myself that couldn’t be the case — especially after remembering the king's comment about my unusual hair color and how seeing me made him crave the smell of blood.
But now, all my assumptions were thoroughly shattered.
I didn’t want to give my first time to such a terrifying king, especially not when I hadn’t even experienced that kind of intimacy with Kyuhyun. Absolutely not.
Yet, despite my resolve, with just a gesture from the king, I found myself unable to remain where I stood.
I felt that if I hesitated any further, this time, it wouldn’t be his hands around my waist, but perhaps a sword.
The king’s hand, which had been gesturing, slowly lowered. At that moment, I carefully took a trembling step and walked toward the bed where the king lay.
It was fortunate that the king, lying on his back and looking at the ceiling, didn’t see me walking unsteadily.
However, the large painting of two dragons above the headboard that I noticed only served to heighten the tension.
Suddenly.
“Ah!”
Just as I arrived, the king, who had been staring at the ceiling, suddenly pulled me onto the bed.
With a loud thud, my body collapsed onto the mattress, and then, with overwhelming strength, he dragged me on top of him.
A woman sitting on the king’s lap — shocked, I tried to get down, but he wouldn’t let me.
He abruptly reached out and grabbed a small sword.
When he drew the blade from its sheath, my whole body froze, and I couldn’t move an inch.
"You need to stab here, precisely."
“!”
"If you push hard enough for this sword to go all the way in, my breath will stop. I’ll help you, so try to take hold of it."
"Wh-what... pl-please spare me..."
“Who told you to die? I said to stab me right here in the chest."
The king soon turned the blade toward his own chest and forced it into my hand.
Though I tried to shake my arm free, unwilling to grab it, he gripped me tightly with great force.
I thought he was emotionless from the start, but to suddenly tell me to kill him — and even handing me a sword — he was utterly insane.
“Aah!”
The hand holding the sword suddenly drew close to the king’s chest.
Once again, a loud exclamation escaped me, but the palace maids outside either didn’t hear it or chose not to come in.
It was hard to believe the king was merely testing me or speaking in jest — his expression was grave, and he never withdrew the blade.
I should have at least cried out for help, but with my eyes locked on his, only raw instinct remained in my mind.
“…P-pl… please stop.”
Before I knew it, the blade was lowered right in front of his clothes.
Why was he telling someone he had just met to kill him?
After failing to return today, I could barely manage my emotions and just slept.
But this was overwhelming.
It was more than I could bear.
I bit down on my lip until it bled, straining to keep the sword from reaching the king’s body.
But in the end, it didn’t go the way I wished, and tears brimmed in my eyes.
Despite all my struggling, the unyielding force wouldn’t move, and tears fell freely, drop by drop, onto the king’s clothes.
“...”
"Ugh..."
I was afraid of the king’s actions, but in truth, half of my tears came from the terror of my own situation.
Hearing that the man went missing without ever making it back, I couldn’t help but think my fate might not be so different.
And in the meantime, the king was pushing me to the edge. I had already reached my limit trying to endure it on my own.
He must have been far more astute than I was, yet even he failed — so what could I possibly do?
My beloved mum and dad, my younger sibling, my dear Kyuhyun, my friends, and the dreams I longed to achieve.
Everything vanished like sea foam just as the Little Mermaid dove into the sea.
Shhhk.
As the king’s chest grew wet with tears, the grip of his hand holding the sword suddenly loosened.
The tears that had been dripping began to flow freely, but as soon as his grip relaxed, I summoned the last of my reason and swiftly dropped the sword to the floor.
The sharp clatter of the blade hitting the ground and my sobs quietly filled the room, and even then, the king watched it all with a cold detachment.
"I thought you were bold because you jumped into the river, but you turned out to be even more delicate than other women."
“…Hic…”
"You will regret not killing me now."
How could I possibly regret not killing someone?
Even if I did regret it, I would never be able to kill him with my own hands.
I rubbed my eyes hard, trying to wipe away the tears that wouldn’t stop.
And, knowing without being told what a huge deal it was to be sitting on the king’s body, I awkwardly moved to get down.
But my tottering body soon tumbled headfirst in the opposite direction and collapsed again.
This time, the king was on top of my body.
Before I could even finish wiping away the tears that clouded my vision, I looked up to see the king, calm and composed, despite having just told me to stab him in the chest.
Then, with his fingers, he smoothly untied the tightly knotted front sash.
I had been wiping away my tears until the outer jeogori slipped off under the king’s long fingers, but when his hand reached for the inner jeogori, I grabbed his wrist.
Looking at his face, frozen in place, I realised that no woman had ever rejected the king’s touch before.
Even if I hadn’t known he was the king, his tall stature and handsome face were on a completely different level from the tired, weathered faces of those worn down by life in the marketplace.
But even so, I couldn’t bring myself to embrace someone so terrifying, nor could I betray Kyuhyun.
As I locked eyes with the fearsome king, my heart trembled enough to stop my tears, but I slowly shook my head.
"...I… have a boyfriend who promised to marry me in the world I used to live in."
“...”
"So... in this country’s terms, I have a betrothed... I just can’t bring myself to leave him behind..."
The man, whose name or age I didn’t even know — only that he was a king — looked at me with a gaze that made it hard to read his thoughts.
I could’ve easily pulled my hand away, but instead met his eyes with an earnest gaze.
His voice, though quiet, rang out clearly, letting me realise just how close he was.
“Has your body already been embraced by him?”
I wanted to understand the intention behind the king's question.
If I said yes, would he stop, believing he couldn’t hold someone who had been touched by another? Or would he try to hold me even more, knowing I’d been embraced before?
I hesitated briefly, but shook my head, fearing he’d accuse me of lying again with that cold, metallic tone.
“…No.”
“You’ve kept yourself until marriage?”
“…Yes.”
"You’re foolishly devoted to the point of pure innocence.”
“...”
“Unfortunately, I lack that kind of virtue.”
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