Thud—!
With the nape of his neck grabbed, he couldn’t even scream as his body was thrown backward.
“Uh, uh… heuk!”
Just as the pain hit him a moment too late and he opened his mouth to scream, Peter froze, caught in the gaze of those ominous golden eyes.
He was going to die.
That was the only thought in his mind, which had gone completely blank like a sheet of white paper.
"S-sa, save—”
“Don’t say a word. If I hear that disgusting voice one more time, I swear I’ll kill you right here.”
Peter didn’t say a word and clamped his mouth shut.
He didn’t have the slightest thought of resisting.
Between his already weak legs, it was damp.
The man, radiating murderous intent, looked so savage that it felt like his gaze alone could rip him to shreds like a rag.
"Are you okay?"
Cabelenus swallowed his anger with effort and checked Alicia’s condition.
Though his eyes burned with emotion like a beast about to strike, his hands were careful and gentle, as if handling glass, while tending to Alicia.
"You’re hurt."
Cabelenus’s gaze shifted to Alicia’s wrist, red and swollen.
He let out a short breath and turned his eyes toward Michael, who didn’t know what to do.
The child's pale, frightened face was filled with terror.
“Stay with your mother.”
With those words, Cabelenus grabbed the collar of Peter, who had slumped down onto the floor.
"Keog, keog!"
Peter coughed hoarsely and struggled, but he couldn’t escape Cabelenus’s grasp.
The body, dangling by one hand, swayed like a sheet of paper in the breeze.
Michael stared blankly at the scene, only snapping out of it when his view was suddenly blocked.
"Don’t look, Michael."
"Why?"
“It’s not something you should see.”
Alicia’s grip on Michael’s hand tightened even more.
Michael wanted to pull away, but couldn’t bring himself to do it.
He could feel the swelling on his mum’s wrist through his fingertips, even without looking.
・・・・・
“Mum, does it hurt?”
"No. It doesn’t hurt."
“That’s a lie.”
“Why would Mum lie to Michael?”
Alicia smiled gently as she brushed back Michael’s hair.
“Mum’s always like that. You always just say you're fine. You tell me not to hide it when I’m hurting, but then you go and do exactly that."
“...”
“I don’t want Mum to endure it either. Mum said it herself — only when you say it hurts can the wound start to heal.”
Michael spread his arms wide and hugged Alicia’s waist.
“It’s because it doesn’t hurt that much. I’ll be fine after some sleep."
"...Really?"
"Of course."
"Then I’ll check again tomorrow. And if you still look like you’re in pain, we’re going to the physician together. Got it?"
"Okay."
Alicia didn’t say anything more and simply patted the child’s back gently.
Maybe it was the circumstances, but the child had matured too early.
Whenever she saw him awkwardly trying to imitate adults, she couldn’t help but feel a heavy, conflicted feeling in her heart.
“I wish you could grow up a little more slowly.”
Once his soft, raspy breaths settled into a steady rhythm, Alicia carefully laid the sleeping Michael down properly on the bed.
Her swollen wrist throbbed, but seeing the child’s face made it bearable.
There was no physician in the village, so to receive treatment, one had to travel to the next village, and even then, the medical fees were anything but cheap.
Until she received the payment from James, money for daily living would be tight for a while.
It was wise to save on any expenses wherever possible.
Ignoring the pain in her swollen wrist, Alicia cautiously went down to the ground floor.
‘…I wonder if it’ll be alright. So much time has passed.’
Alicia hesitated for a moment, then cautiously looked out the window.
It was already getting dark outside, but Cabelenus hadn’t returned.
‘I should have handled it myself.’
Alicia weakly pressed her forehead against the window.
The cool night air felt especially chilly.
And then, after who knew how long, a presence was felt nearby.
Alicia slowly raised her head.
"The night air’s too cold for you to stay like that."
“…When did you get here?”
"A while ago."
"Then you could have at least called out to me."
"I figured you wouldn’t be pleased to see me come."
Exactly five steps.
At just that distance away, Cabelenus gave a faint smile.
Alicia bit her lip firmly without a word.
It was strange.
In the dimming darkness where nothing should have been visible, the man’s face was clearly visible.
She could even tell what he was thinking — everything.
"Why did you interfere? I could have handled it on my own just fine."
"I know."
“You know?”
Alicia asked back reflexively.
"I know I can’t get a glimpse of your entire life in just a moment, but even from that, it’s clear how hard your past must have been."
“...”
"At first, I was angry. If you had still been by my side, you wouldn’t have had to suffer like this. I would have filled you with the best of everything — clothes, food, nothing lacking."
“...”
"But if that had been the case, you wouldn’t have been able to raise your voice like you did today. So now, I don’t really know whether I should be angry at the hard times you’ve been through or not."
Cabelenus remained standing in place, still looking at Alica.
The woman he remembered was so small and fragile.
She was a woman who struggled even to raise her voice, always cautious and burdened with many worries.
Because of that, he wanted to hold her more, and naturally, his worries grew.
“Madame Morco once told me something like this: that you are not weak.”
“...”
"Now I think I finally understand what she meant. Why she said those things."
At the name she hadn’t heard in a long time, Alicia instinctively wrapped her arms around herself.
She still couldn’t forget the memories of that day.
There were so many things she wanted to ask about that day.
But she couldn’t do that.
Because dredging up the past would only revive the lingering regrets she had barely managed to put to rest.
“It was just me struggling desperately. If I didn’t raise my voice like that, everyone would see me as too easy.”
“But in the end, you overcame it.”
“...”
“You did well, truly.”
Why did her eyes sting at the calm voice that was quietly spoken?
Alicia bit her lower lip, hoping he couldn’t see her expression in the dark night.
“I don’t want to hear things like that. The only reason I waited for Your Highness was because of Peter. He’s the village chief’s son, and if anything were to happen to him, I…”
As her excuses dragged on, Alicia couldn’t finish her sentence and finally just let out a ragged breath.
Actually, there was something else she wanted to say, but she was afraid that if she said it, all the emotions she had been suppressing would burst out, so she couldn't.
Even at this moment, his unwavering gaze fixed on her made her throat tighten.
“I didn’t kill him, so don’t worry. Even I don’t kill people all the time.”
“I didn’t mean it like that—”
“Sorry.”
“For showing you that side of me.”
At Cabelenus’s apology, Alicia finally bowed her head deeply.
Their first meeting had reeked of blood, and it was well known to both that he was called a blood-crazed killer. Now, trying to somehow cover that up seemed strange — no. It had to be that way.
Clutching the window frame, Alicia struggled to lift her head.
“...Since when did Your Highness start caring so much about others?”
“...”
“Don’t pretend to be weak now. Your Highness is someone cold-hearted enough to even abandon your own child.”
“...”
“Don’t think you can take credit just because you helped a little this time. Even if Your Highness says so, my stance won’t change. So, please leave now.”
'You don’t need to put up with such harsh words for no reason.'
Alicia couldn’t bring herself to say the last part and slammed the window shut.
Then she turned around but didn’t take more than a few steps before collapsing to the floor.
Before she knew it, tears had fallen and stained the hem of her skirt one by one.
・・・・・
“Mum?”
“...Michael?”
Alicia barely lifted her unusually heavy eyelids to look at Michael.
Michael's face was heavy with worry, unbefitting of a child.
“Why are you sleeping here like this?”
“Ah, it’s just because Mum was so tired…”
“But you told me it would be a big problem if I slept on the floor.”
“I’m sorry.”
She must have cried so much yesterday that she fell asleep exhausted.
Alicia smiled awkwardly and tried to get up, but frowned at the throbbing pain.
“Mum, does it hurt?”
“No. It doesn’t hurt.”
“But your wrist is more swollen than yesterday.”
“That’s because it’s morning. It’ll get better soon.”
Alicia lightly waved her hand in front of Michael with a casual expression.
Every time she moved her hand, she felt a slight pain, but it wasn’t unbearable.
“But…”
“Michael, can you go to Aunt Jona’s and get some milk? Mum will make pancakes for breakfast.”
Before Michael could say anything else, Alicia gave him a quick kiss on the forehead and stood up.
"Ah, come to think of it, I used up all the eggs baking cookies yesterday, so if you could bring some of those too…"
To ease Michael’s suspicious gaze, Alicia deliberately exaggerated her tone as she opened the window, but her expression stiffened.
On the windowsill lay a bandage along with a small container.
With trembling hands, Alicia picked up the container and opened the lid.
From inside the container came a sharp, familiar smell she had encountered before.
It was Schwarhan’s medicine.
Alicia reflexively turned her head, searching for Cabelenus.
But he was nowhere to be seen.
‘So then, about what happened last night…’
Alicia sank to the ground helplessly.
The face of the man who had stood at a distance, watching her, as if afraid he might frighten her, flickered through her mind anew.
“Mum, what’s wrong? Are you crying?”
Michael worriedly snuggled into Alicia’s arms.
“Mum, don’t cry. Michael’s here, so don’t cry, okay?”
“Hic, heug… heug, heug…"
Instead of answering, Alicia hugged Michael tightly and buried her face in his small shoulder.
She knew she shouldn’t be like this in front of the child, and kept telling herself that over and over in her mind, but once the tears started, she just couldn’t stop them.
Facing Cabelenus felt like holding a sword without a hilt.
Though she swung the weapon clearly to inflict wounds, every time she struck, she ended up covered in blood herself.
・・・・・
“I admit it.”
“Admit what?”
“That I’m weak.”
Michael crossed his arms and arrogantly lifted his chin.
“Do you really have to admit that? You’re obviously weak just by looking.”
“Mister, you always speak so annoyingly. Do you talk to my mum like this too?”
“No way.”
“So why do you treat me like that?”
“I told you. I don’t like you.”
Cabelenus looked down at Michael with his usual annoyed expression.
He thought the kid might be scared by what happened yesterday, but to his relief, the child was bright and carefree, completely unfazed.
“Why do you dislike me? Everyone says I look just like my mum.”
“You don’t look like her. Not at all.”
“No, I do! I do look like her! I look the most like my mum in the whole world!”
“You’re entitled to your delusions.”
If he had at least smirked slyly, Michael might have been able to laugh it off, but saying it so flatly without any expression made it even more unpleasant.
Michael glanced at Cabelenus’s leg, then remembered the disaster from a few days ago and pouted with regret.
“Seriously, who actually likes you? I don’t like you either.”
“Then stop bothering me so much.”
Cabelenus stacked the firewood he had gathered on the floor and picked up an axe.
Other houses had already started stacking firewood to prepare for winter, but Alicia’s house was still quite bare.
Even though some firewood was collected, it was mostly just twigs that would burn up quickly.
Even if he had to leave eventually, he didn’t want Alicia to spend even a single day in the cold.
The woman he remembered was especially sensitive to the cold.
“I didn’t want to say this to you either—”
Thunk!
“But there’s no one else I can ask—”
Thunk!
“Just a little—”
Thunk!
“Stop chopping firewood and listen to me!”
Unable to hold it in any longer, Michael stomped his foot irritably.
“I’d rather chop firewood than waste time chatting nonsense with you.”
Cabelenus swung the axe with a bored expression.
Though it looked like a light swing, the thick log split with a sharp crack as soon as the blade hit.
“Mum cried.”
“...”
Though it was irritating how Cabelenus stopped chopping wood the instant the topic of his mum came up, Cabelenus was the only one Michael could ask for help.
Michael forced a smile, silently vowing to get back at him someday.
"So, what I’m saying is, can you make me stronger too?"
“How does your mum crying have anything to do with you getting stronger?”
"Mum never admits to being in pain in front of me, even when she is hurting. She rarely cries as well."
“...”
“But since you came, Mum cries a lot. That’s why you annoy me, but at the same time, I’m a little jealous. You’re the one who makes Mum stop holding it all in.”
Cabelenus’s Adam’s apple trembled for a moment, but Michael, unaware, continued chattering with a disgruntled look.
“Mum used to say that holding things in makes you sick. So I always wished she wouldn’t hold things in. But she always does — because of me. I think she believes she has to protect me no matter what. But I’m all grown up now.”
“...”
"That's why I want to get stronger as quickly as possible. I want to become so strong that Mum will be amazed and won't have to endure anything because of me."
Michael stood on his tiptoes, trying his best to meet Cabelenus’s gaze.
The child's eyes, pure without a speck of dust, glittered beneath the sunlight.
Translator's Corner:
Michael is honestly the cutest!!! He's such a thoughtful kid!
∧,,,∧
( ̳• · • ̳)
/ づ♡ Anyway, thanks for your patience, everyone~ hope you all have a great week!
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