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・・・・・
Learning Chinese characters was truly tedious. It wasn’t completely overwhelming since I knew the basics, but memorising characters with so many dizzying strokes felt like memorising English words, and I would forget them as soon as I looked away.
Honestly, I didn’t want to do it at all, but since the king was personally teaching me, I couldn’t refuse. After studying Chinese characters for several days, I realised just how remarkable Hangul truly was.
“What Hanja character is this?”
“...This is…”
The king pointed to a Chinese character in the book he had brought and asked. I clearly remembered him teaching it a few days ago, but paper was scarce here, so I couldn’t scribble with a pen to memorise it properly. My memory wavered, and I couldn’t answer immediately.
It was already the third time he asked, and seeing me still slow to answer, the king let out an audible sigh.
Even though I had prepared for the civil service exams myself, I couldn’t help but feel a little foolish at that moment.
Feeling a bit deflated, I lowered my gaze, and the king put the book down. Seeing my awkward expression, he went ahead and slid the book completely under the desk.
“Since you didn’t entirely lack knowledge of Hanja, I tried to teach you, but it's too much for you.”
“...It seems so.”
“I’ll teach you step by step, starting with the easy ones.”
The king dipped the brush generously into finely ground ink and wrote the Chinese characters with precision, almost as if they were typed on a computer. Perhaps because I felt I wasn’t doing well, seeing him write the characters as neatly as Hangul made him seem a little impressive.
Still, his willingness to personally teach me Chinese characters so I could adapt and live here was both unexpected and appreciated. Clearly, he was now more inclined to protect me than to want to kill me, which was a relief.
“This is the character for ‘heaven’ [天].”
“Oh, I know that one.”
Swish.
Flinch.
“Ahem… I’ll start learning from the very beginning.”
Even though I hadn’t known the answer the previous three times, the moment a familiar Chinese character appeared, I spoke confidently as if I knew it all. I quickly pretended to focus as if I were in learning mode.
Indeed, the king did not need to say much — just one look of his subdued the other person.
The king taught me the Thousand Character Classic, starting with ‘heaven’ [天], which I had often seen on TV as a child. I thought it would be easy, but some of the characters were unfamiliar, so I studied them by looking at them repeatedly and writing them on the floor with my hand.
However, I had heard that the Thousand Character Classic was made up of a thousand Chinese characters. Did he really intend to teach them all? He must have been busy attending to state affairs, yet he still took an hour or two during the day to stop by and teach me.
“But is it really okay for you to teach me like this?”
“What do you mean by that?”
“You must have a lot to do, yet it feels like you go out of your way to stop by and teach me every time...”
“It’s not a bad thing for me either. After all, I’m just using the energy I would have spent on holding you to teach you instead.”
“!”
“You’ve lost weight since you first came.”
The king’s gaze swept over my body. For a moment, I stopped looking at the character he had handed me and blinked when his hand suddenly grabbed my wrist.
“You’ve lost enough that it’s noticeable. Is it because the food here doesn’t suit you?”
“N… no, it’s fine. It tastes good.”
“I hadn’t held you enough for you to lose weight, so why are you losing it?”
By avoiding instant food and eating mainly vegetables, I had indeed been steadily losing weight.
It wasn’t a bad thing. Sleeping regularly was helping the unnecessary weight I’d gained to melt away. What amazed me, though, was the king’s sharp eye for noticing it.
It must be hard to tell with the loose hanbok covering me.
He brushed and felt the flesh on my inner wrist, then immediately ordered the court lady outside to bring some refreshments.
For a moment, I wondered if he was thinking of fattening me up just to hold me, so I busily pretended to study the Thousand Character Classic.
Then, whether on purpose or not, I heard the king’s rather mischievous remark.
“Memorising all the characters will take a long time, so it’s best to memorise twenty characters a day from now on.”
“Huh? Twenty at a time?”
“Even I have to teach you that much just to restrain my urge to hold you. I’ve already reduced it to twenty characters.”
“But that’s too many…”
“Do you want to be held once? Then you can see whether twenty characters are too few or too many.”
“…I’ll memorise them.”
Chuckle.
While I was busy memorising the Thousand Character Classic, snacking on refreshments even blander than my typical confectionery, the king said he would stop by again in the evening and rose from his seat, nudging the refreshments a little closer to me as he did.
“Make sure to eat well before my patience runs out.”
He didn’t have to say that before he left, though.
When he had previously held me in the bath, even though I showed signs of discomfort, he still indulged so heedlessly, and now, seeing him leave me alone just because I had lost weight felt unfamiliar.
When someone I never expected to act differently did, the intensity of my emotions would surge. I stared blankly at the king’s retreating figure, then gazed dazedly at the Thousand Character Classic.
“…Huuu.”
It was truly remarkable that the king of a nation would go so far as to personally write out Chinese characters to teach me, though I wouldn’t need to do it once I returned home anyway.
The kinder the king acted, the more a little fear crept in, because with my affectionate nature, I was afraid that even a tiny bit of lingering guilt toward him might remain.
That was, assuming I would eventually be able to return.
He was honest with his feelings, and lately it was obvious, even to General Hunmu, that he wanted me by his side. From my standpoint right now, I could barely restrain myself from desperately trying to leave without caring about anyone. Yet having to memorise the characters often made me forget that fact.
Focusing on something allowed me to forget my current reality, which was nice, but at the same time, it kept me trapped in a vicious cycle of settling into this reality.
I continued snacking on the refreshments while memorising the Thousand Character Classic that the king had personally written for me.
It used to be a bland, tasteless traditional confectionery I wouldn’t even glance at during the ancestral rites, but now it tasted pleasantly sweet and delicious.
・・・・・
"From a young age, they endured countless persecutions and life-threatening situations. Born as twins, one was abandoned in the river immediately after birth, but was discovered by a passing monk and survived. Later, when they were six, they met again at a temple. Although both were born with one eye, their spiritual power was so strong that they became recognised as prominent shamans in the region."
Hearing the story that his subordinate had learned, General Hunmu kept recalling Yewon frantically shouting and running down.
From the beginning, she possessed neither fear of the king nor the heart to serve him; yet, the way she searched for the elderly woman, with no regard for those around her, was truly desperate and earnest.
"It is said that, fearing people would discover they were twins, the older and younger sisters took turns living as a single person. However, the older sister has now gone missing and can no longer be seen."
“Is that elderly woman still practising as a shaman?”
"According to reports, as she grew older, she survived by giving simple fortune readings. She currently lives in a small hut in a remote mountain valley, and hardly ever goes out."
“...”
"It seems the deceased monk who saved that shaman was from the same temple the General had visited. Although she doesn’t leave her home often, she goes to that temple a few times a year to make offerings."
Was it really just a coincidence that the elderly woman went to the temple when Yewon wanted to go there?
Of all places, it was a strange coincidence that the temple they visited happened to be the very one where the monk who had saved that shaman had resided.
General Hunmu gestured to his subordinate to withdraw and rose from his seat.
Recently, the king’s unusual favour toward Yewon had astonished him as well, but the more he thought about it, the stranger it seemed that she had discovered a key that could allow her to return at such a moment.
Or perhaps it was a good thing that she had discovered it before becoming more accustomed to the palace and before conceiving a child.
As he recalled Yewon’s desperate face, pleading to let her meet the elderly woman just once, a wave stirred in his heart, as if a stone had been thrown into it, despite the loyalty he had sworn to the king.
But this time, he could not grant her request. She was already the woman the king wished to keep by his side, and not long ago, the king had even said something unbelievable. He mentioned the queen’s position directly.
"If we dismiss Buyeon Yuhwa, how much resistance would we face from the courtiers?"
The king, who had suddenly asked him that unexpected question, abruptly decided to teach Yewon Hanja characters and had several books brought to her, most of them containing simple characters. It revealed the king’s desire to keep Yewon by his side — far more than General Hunmu had realised.
However, Yewon herself still did not fully understand the king’s heart and had no desire to stay here. Yet the king wished to keep her by his side and would not permit her to leave.
Knowing both of them well, General Hunmu could not sort out the turmoil in his mind and stared at the location of the shaman’s house, which his subordinate had noted down, as if taking careful aim.
He shouldn’t have taken any interest in the first place, but seeing Yewon searching so frantically, he couldn’t help but notice.
Perhaps the greatest problem was himself.
・・・・・
As summer drew to a close, the weather turned fairly mild, yet before the chill set in, a last surge of heat warmed me from the morning, as if I had taken a restorative tonic. I wasn’t the only one feeling it; Bin, anticipating the cold that would follow, busily filled Sucheong’s vacant post and also made sure cold water was ready.
The day was so hot that I barely managed to eat when the king appeared, saying he would teach me Chinese characters again. Accustomed to air conditioning, I found the weather oppressive, yet the king didn’t seem to feel the heat, as if he were used to it.
"Have you memorised all the Hanja characters?”
“Yes… I’ve memorised them, but…”
“Well, I’ll find out once I ask. But what’s with your face?"
“Pardon?”
“The fatigue on your face is unmistakable.”
“It’s nothing. It’s just that it’s a bit hot.”
“Once this heat passes, a cool autumn will arrive. You’re quite sensitive to the heat. Did you happen to take another medicinal tonic?”
“No! Where I live, when it gets this hot, we turn on the air conditioner and eat lots of cold things like ice cream. Since that doesn’t exist here, that’s why I'm like this.”
“Ice cream? What's that?”
“Um… well… it’s something where you mix sweet things with ice and eat it.”
“I’ll have one of the court ladies make it for you.”
“There aren’t any suitable ingredients here.”
“Didn’t you say it’s something you eat by mixing ice with something sweet?”
It was difficult to explain things like condensed milk and cream to the king, so I paused to think. Then I remembered bingsu. With bingsu, there would also be red beans, so it might be possible to make it, but not wanting to cause unnecessary trouble on such a sweltering day, I shook my head.
“That may be so, but since the weather is hot and it’s hard to make, it’s fine.”
“Does it trouble you to make the court ladies do it?”
“What?”
“What are the things you need? Tell me.”
“Ah…”
“Go on.”
“It’s really fine….”
“Stubborn, indeed. You’re the only one who would defy me like this.”
“Just ice… red beans… and injeolmi [1] or soybean powder will do.”
“It’s nothing all that difficult, so why the delay? You there.”
The king soon instructed a eunuch who had followed him to bring the items I had mentioned directly to the room. Normally, the eunuch would have lowered his head and prepared them immediately, but being told to bring them directly here, he looked at the king in surprise.
“By red beans, do you mean raw ones?”
“No! The boiled ones…”
“Bring ice, red bean porridge, injeolmi, and soybean powder. What else is needed?”
Was he really intending to make it here for my sake? The king’s resolute attitude left me just as flustered, but to spare him needless trouble, I mentioned a mortar, a cutting board, and some bowls. After all, if I had to eat it anyway, I planned to make it myself.
There probably wasn’t any ice stored here, and though this was a palace where a woman ought to preserve her dignity, I would still have to break the ice myself.
“It may seem like there’s a lot I can do for you, but in reality, there isn’t.”
“Yes…?”
"So if I can at least do something like this for you, I want to."
“...”
“That way, you’ll be able to adjust to this place a little more quickly, won’t you?”
“…I sincerely apologise.”
Not long after the king spoke, the court ladies came in carrying armfuls of the ingredients I had named. The red bean porridge would take some time, so the ice, injeolmi, and soybean powder were prepared first. Since this was the first time such a thing had happened, the eunuch’s expression was still full of bewilderment.
“That doesn’t look like a very appetising combination.”
“Ah, it still needs a bit of preparation.”
Red beans would make it look more authentic, but since the king had even gone so far as to prepare these ingredients himself, I rolled up my sleeves. Lifting my hanbok like this was clearly not something a lady should do, yet seeing real ice for the first time since arriving here made me a little excited.
“In the palace… I’m not sure if it’s proper to do something like this, but first, we must crush this ice finely with a mortar.”
Considering how quietly one had to walk while in the palace, this might be too noisy, but fortunately, the ice wasn’t too large, so it seemed I could crush it easily with the mortar.
But just as I was about to crush the ice with the mortar, the king stood up and sat directly behind me. Then he took the pestle from my hands and wielded it himself.
“I… I’ll do it… You really shouldn’t be doing something like this…”
“If you have the strength to pound with a pestle, then save it for when you are in my arms.”
“!”
The king of a whole nation was breaking ice with a mortar, all because of a single thing I said.
Perhaps because he was a man, the ice shattered into pieces after only a few strikes of the pestle. The sudden, tremendous sound made the eunuch call out from outside, “Your Majesty!” but the king did not respond.
“What else should I do?”
“…I’ll handle it from here on.”
My heart softened at the king’s act of breaking the ice himself, and I couldn’t bring myself to look back, keeping my eyes fixed straight ahead.
Meanwhile, it was as if a magician were at work in the royal kitchen, for the red bean porridge had already been cooked and brought out. When the court lady entered carrying it, the eunuch standing behind her, seeing the utterly incomprehensible scene, bowed his head in silence, already resigned.
“It’s all ready now.”
“Already? If it’s this simple, why didn’t you say so sooner?”
“Yes?”
“If there’s anything you want to eat, tell me from now on. I am the king of this palace, and I can give you whatever you wish.”
“…It just came to mind because today is so hot. It'll cool down soon, so it’s nothing to worry about.”
I filled a bowl with finely crushed ice and evenly poured the cooled red bean porridge over it. Normally, one would use red beans simmered in sugar, but using the porridge that came with it made it look surprisingly like proper bingsu. When I stirred in all the sugar that came with the porridge, the king let out a small sound of surprise, and I murmured under my breath that this was how it was normally done.
I suppose I never really had a knack for cooking. Up until I poured the red bean porridge, it at least looked decent, but once I added the neatly sliced injeolmi and sprinkled the soybean powder — though I hated to say it — it ended up looking like dog food. The taste would probably be fine, but when I turned around, declaring it finished, the king’s expression made it clear he was far from impressed.
“So this is what’s called ice cream?”
“It’s more accurate to call it patbingsu [2] rather than ice cream.”
I held out a spoon to the king, but as if he didn’t really want to eat, he gestured for me to try it first.
“Ah… I should have made two portions. I only made one, so just a moment…”
“It’s fine. You try it first.”
He didn’t seem eager to eat it, but seeing the king’s curiosity, I carefully stirred the patbingsu in the bowl with a spoon. Then I placed a piece of injeolmi on top, scooped up a generous portion of ice, and put it into my mouth.
“Wow…”
It tasted even more like patbingsu than I expected, and I was thrilled. For the first time in a while here, it felt like I was encountering a piece of the place I used to live.
“Is it tasty?”
“Yes, it’s very delicious.”
“...”
“Would you like to try some?”
“No need.”
“Even though it looks like this after being mixed, the taste is good.”
“...”
Grateful for the effort he had put into preparing the ice for me, I grabbed the king’s spoon. If the other courtiers had seen it, they might have been shocked that I dared to share the bowl I had eaten from, but I scooped up a generous spoonful of ice mixed with red beans, placed a piece of injeolmi on top, and offered it.
“Do I really have to eat this?”
“You worked hard breaking the ice. Once you taste it, you’ll change your mind.”
“I don’t think I need to eat this.”
“Pfft.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at the king’s expression, as if he were a child reluctant to eat his vegetables.
As expected, something sweet could lift one’s mood. Just a single spoonful of patbingsu seemed to have brightened my spirits considerably.
I felt the king’s piercing gaze on me when I suddenly burst into laughter, and I quickly erased the smile from my face. But it was the first time I had ever looked at him and laughed so openly, so unguarded.
Startled by my own reaction, I froze for a moment. The king soon took the spoon from me and tasted the patbingsu himself. After trying it, he didn’t seem as moved as I was.
The sweetness must have been a bit strong for him; after savouring it a few times, he only nodded a couple of times.
“Are you all right…?”
“Do you like it because it’s sweet?”
"Yes... it’s refreshing... and sweet."
“Have you ever seen your own smile?”
“Huh? You mean my smile?”
“It’s as sweet as this patbingsu.”
Translator's Corner:
[1] Injeolmi is a Korean rice cake made with glutinous rice. Source: https://kimchimari.com/injeolmi-rice-cake/
[2] Patbingsu is red bean shaved ice, and is the traditional, classic version of bingsu.
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