・・・・・
Naturally, the Harvest Festival performance ended with great enthusiasm and attention.
So, who was behind the planning?
Almost immediately, sponsorship offers and partnership proposals poured in.
Everyone in the industry was eager to get on my good side.
‘I’m so proud of that.’
Shrugging my shoulders, I briefly indulged in some self-praise before politely turning away those who offered me their business cards and quickly heading toward the VIP section.
The doormen guarding the entrance to the VIP section greeted me respectfully the moment they spotted me and promptly made way for me to enter.
‘Alright. Today, Fel won’t even have a chance to take care of me. I’m going to handle everything from start to finish.’
...But the difficulty was just too great. It meant I had to act so distracting that someone as naturally considerate as Felix couldn’t show his usual kindness and care.
I took a deep breath in and, as I exhaled, steeled my resolve.
Then I drew back the curtain and stepped confidently into the VIP lounge.
Felix, as if he knew I was coming, was looking my way, blending into the luxurious scenery.
“How was the play?”
I casually asked, but in reality, I could already guess what he would say.
Felix always liked anything related to me.
“Rin’s stories are always gentle and warm, so I like them.”
See? I knew he’d say that.
His answer was exactly as I expected — no surprises at all.
Feeling a little embarrassed for asking, I let out a small, awkward cough.
‘He seems like the kind of person who would quietly accept even a stone I picked up from the roadside.’
Because of that, I didn’t really know what kind of food he liked, what music he enjoyed, or what genres of books and plays he was into — all the little preferences a lover should know by heart.
I couldn’t really argue when people said I was being too indifferent.
But Felix was absolutely hopeless at expressing himself.
Even when I asked what he liked, he’d just say, “Anything.”
‘You can't possibly like everything.’
Even animals had likes and dislikes, so there was no way he wouldn’t have any preferences.
But as for what Felix had actually mentioned liking up to this point…
‘Cats...’
It was no help at all.
I shook my head and brushed away my thoughts.
“Shall we go, sir?”
When I held out my hand and spoke playfully, Felix gave me a strange look.
It wasn’t a warm smile, but he didn’t seem angry either.
His face was composed, restrained — neither one thing nor the other, as if he were carefully putting his emotions away.
What kind of reaction was that?
Just as I glanced around uneasily, he placed his large hand gently over mine.
“Where are we going?”
Then he tilted his head slowly and asked.
His gaze was submissive as if he were willingly surrendering to my request to let me take the lead.
There was something about the way he looked up at me from his seat — steady and intent — that made my face grow warm.
The eyes that were usually curved with laughter now looked soft and languid, stripped of their usual cheer.
"Mm?"
Then, as if urging me to answer, he let out a low nasal hum and asked again.
‘Why does he look like he’s enjoying this?’
He genuinely seemed curious about where I was going to take him and what I planned to do.
I thought he was secretly disappointed in me — wasn’t that why he didn’t even smile?
‘Oh — could this really be my last chance to make up for my mistake?’
He openly looked like he was expecting something, so I became incredibly pressured.
If I said this was just a normal date, wouldn’t it totally ruin the atmosphere?
"First, let’s have lunch..."
"Lunch?"
I swallowed my saliva while preparing myself mentally, then answered seriously.
“From now on, I want to get to know what Fel likes.”
I came up with a hypothesis.
One of the reasons why Felix might have become accustomed to caring for others was that he never had the opportunity to care for himself.
If he learned what he liked, what he disliked, and even discovered his own hobbies along the way, perhaps he would then learn to cherish himself a little more.
‘That way, Felix will slowly start giving me the chance to see his true feelings.’
Just for a moment, he could toss aside that ‘damn consideration.’
I swallowed the harsh words rising inside me and instead gave him a sweet, gentle smile.
・・・ ・・
Today was our monumental first date.
I thought a lot about what we should eat, but in the end, seasonal food was the way to go.
Recently, a coastal city near the capital opened a new port, and fresh seafood overflowed into the capital.
Among the many restaurants, I booked a table at the most popular establishment and brought Felix there.
After he sat down, he habitually made sure I was comfortable first, fussing over me a little, before finally bringing the food to his own mouth.
“It’s delicious.”
Even the simple, utterly straightforward compliment spoken in a soft voice sounded completely sweet.
It came across like the highest praise from a beautiful gourmet.
But it felt somewhat awkward.
There was no hint of soul behind the words.
“Is it really delicious?”
As I poked the lobster, which had been nicely prepared for easy eating, with my fork and asked, Felix nodded in response.
“Yes.”
“You like seafood, right?”
“I don’t have any foods I avoid.”
“So, you mean you like it?”
“As long as I’m with Rin, I like anything.”
“That’s the perfect textbook answer.”
I would give him a perfect score. But that was not quite the answer I was looking for.
“I’ll give you a choice: do you like lobster, or don’t you?”
At that, Felix made a troubled face.
“It’s delicious. Very.”
"Do you like it?"
“It’s filling, too.”
"So, do you like it?"
“You’re asking a tough question.”
As the persistent questions continued, he finally sighed and surrendered.
“Even if I were eating military rations, it would taste good as long as Rin was by my side.”
Judging by the specific example, it seems the worst meal of his life was military rations.
Still, he did have some likes and dislikes after all.
I looked at Felix with a brief, sympathetic glance before asking.
"Then, what about your hobbies? Reading?"
Come to think of it, he hadn’t gone a moment without a book in his hands since way back.
I had forgotten for a while since he hadn’t been seen reading lately.
Only now did I seem to properly recall Felix’s hobby, and I smiled brightly.
That was when he poured cold water on me.
"Books were just a means."
“Then, what was the purpose?”
“To absorb knowledge.”
Well, reading books to gain knowledge wasn’t exactly wrong…
“What about archery? You were a master marksman. You were also good at swordsmanship and even earned a title at one point.”
“That… I just did because I somehow ended up becoming good at it.”
The archers and swordsmen around him would probably curse him out under their breath if they heard that.
I didn’t even dare ask about magic.
I was sure he would say something like, ‘I just happened to be born with magical talent, so I became a sorcerer by accident.’”
“Ah, if I were to mention a hobby I ’ve picked up recently, I’d say I enjoy watching plays.”
“Don’t tell me it’s because I’m a playwright?”
“...”
That must be the answer.
Could it really be that the only thing he truly liked was cats?
I had a rough idea from how he’d acted so far, but seeing it clearly now made it feel even more serious.
He couldn’t readily say what he liked or what his hobbies were.
It was certain that he had never allowed himself to even think about such things.
Had his life been so lacking in spare time that he never had the luxury?
It seemed that he never included himself among the people he cared for.
“Maybe I should at least get a cat...”
Feeling a bit frustrated and sorry inside, I muttered something without realising it.
Then Felix's lips curled into a faint, delicate smile as he spoke.
"Well, I mean, cats are cute, but I wasn’t that into them from the very beginning."
What did he mean by that?
I froze for a moment, then pointed at myself.
No way?
“Think as you please.”
"You’ve already given away all the answers, so what do you mean by 'think as I please'?"
I thought he was still upset, but for some reason, there seemed to be a hint of laughter in his voice.
What the heck, then?
Was I the only thing he truly liked in this whole world, and the only thing he was interested in?
Suddenly, that remark came to mind. The one Claudia said with an indifferent expression while resting her chin on her hand after permitting Felix to marry.
—He devotes all the joys and sorrows of his life to Rin. If he didn’t love you that much, I wouldn’t have even thought about yielding in the first place.
Her tone was as light as a breeze, but the meaning behind those words weighed heavily on my heart.
I stared blankly up at Felix before finally coming back to my senses.
This was a rare opportunity, and I couldn’t just walk away feeling only Felix’s love without any real gain.
“If you’ve finished eating, shall we go see the flowers together?”
"Flowers?"
Felix widened his eyes and asked back in surprise at my rather unexpected suggestion.
"Yes!"
I answered boldly and took his hand. Although I could have used teleportation, I deliberately led him on foot to the royal garden.
Felix didn’t resist at all and was pulled along meekly.
He looked at me with warm eyes, repeatedly touching the corners of his mouth.
Before I knew it, we had arrived at the royal palace garden, where the scent of herbs tickled my nose.
Felix surveyed the endless field of chamomile flowers, then, surrounded by blooms, turned his clear gaze toward me.
His clear eyes were like the bright sky covering the fields.
It was rare for a person to blend so naturally with the flowers like that.
“Remember? This is the flower Fel called beautiful for the first time.”
Actually, these flowers were known as herbs rather than ornamentals.
Though not as flashy as roses, their clustered presence gave off a pure and lovely charm.
If Felix couldn’t quite say what he liked, then how about starting with this flower that he called beautiful for the first time?
With that thought, I continued speaking.
“I happened to hear from the royal gardener that this flower’s meaning is resilience — strength that doesn’t yield to adversity.”
After hearing the flower’s meaning, I thought it suited Felix really well.
Though honestly, saying things like this made me feel like one of those cliché third-generation chaebol heirs, trying to charm the heroine with cringey pickup lines.
“I did say something like that.”
Then Felix chuckled and added.
“But it wasn’t the flowers I called beautiful...”
At that moment, he uttered an unexpected remark.
“Huh? Then what were you looking at…?”
Oh no, did I totally misread that moment? Was there anything else around besides flowers when Felix said that?
“This goes well with these flowers.”
Felix revealed his pure white face among the tiny, delicate flowers.
I stared blankly at his sacred appearance, so perfectly in harmony with the pristine blossoms, like a figure from a painting, before finally asking.
“You mean Felix?”
“You’re such a fool, really.”
A… fool…
I was taken aback hearing Felix call me that, but he was right. I really had said something foolish.
Only after realising what he meant did I let out a deep sigh and mutter.
“Look who’s calling who a fool.”
Felix was truly a foolish person who only ever cared about me.
A real fool.
A fool who never gave himself a second thought — so pitiful in his selflessness.
Because of that, I couldn’t stop regretting that I wasn’t more attentive and caring.
"Fel, you’re not really mad, are you?"
At first, I didn’t notice because it was the first time since Walter that I had seen him with a neutral expression.
It was a look I hadn’t seen on his usual face before.
But the longer I looked, the more it seemed like he was barely holding back a smile.
Maybe I had struck a chord because with the breeze gently brushing past us, he let out a quiet, ticklish laugh.
“It’s because you’re cute.”
“...”
“I just wanted to keep looking at you.”
“I’m sorry.”
Felix lightly swept his palm over the fragrant herb garden I had brought him to and smiled warmly.
Rather than feeling angry about being deceived, I melted away without even having time for such emotions to arise.
‘Someone who sees me as their entire world, who believes I’m the very truth of their existence… there’s no way they could ever get angry at me.’
Should I be happy about this, or should I be sad?
With a tangle of emotions caught in my throat, I simply chose to care for Felix all the more.
To love and cherish Felix as much as he was unable to love and care for himself.
⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡ ⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆
If you notice any errors or broken links, please let me know and I will get that fixed~ Additionally, if you would like to support me, I have a Ko-fi ~ Thank you! 💖